6 Ways to Manage Overwhelming Emotions

If we are anxious the nervous system becomes agitated. If we are depressed the system slows or shuts down. In both cases we are overwhelmed by our emotions.

There’s no doubt about it, the effects of the pandemic have become challenging not only physically, but also mentally and emotionally. 

Most of us have been impacted physically and emotionally, whether it has been by falling ill, having a relative or friend who is sick, losing an important person, working at home, giving birth, becoming pregnant, moving or renovating. We are living in unusual and unpredictable times. ​

In addition, we are also being required to isolate from our family and friends, who during normal times are vital in helping us to regulate our emotions. We co-regulate one
another by being in close proximity via touch, sight, smell, sound and tone of voice.
When we are together, “the feel good hormone” oxytocin is secreted and we feel safe
and nurtured. Being deprived of this physical presence affects us emotionally. It can lead to anxiety, depression or lashing out at those we care about in an attempt to discharge our discomfort.

If we are anxious the nervous system becomes agitated. If we are depressed the system slows or shuts down. In both cases we are overwhelmed by our emotions.

Here are six strategies to create a strong foundation for our physical and mental health:

1. Stay connected
It is vital to maintain and nourish both virtual and in-person {either socially distanced or within your bubble} relationships during this time. Try to be open and vulnerable with others in order to give and receive support as needed. A person cannot support you if they don’t know what is going on with you. Reach out regularly for chats, Zoom calls, texts with people who are safe, trustworthy and who do not agitate or upset you. If there are some people in your circle who you trigger you, kindly limit your contact with them. It is essential to set and maintain boundaries at any time, but particularly now.

2. Create structure
Another easy tactic is to maintain or create structure in your day. Think of it as the
scaffolding that keeps us safe and secure in uncertain times. Try to get up at the same
time, eat, work, care for children just as you would in normal times. During the pandemic we have all had the experience of dealing with the unexpected;
tech problems, daycare challenges, pets disturbing our Zoom meetings, but as long as
we have some structure in place, it makes us feel that we have a bit of control.

3. Exercise
The benefits of exercise for our physical and emotional health has been well
documented, so make sure to engage in it daily. This doesn’t have to look like traditional methods of exercise. Do whatever makes you feel good as long as you are moving. This could simply be getting up from your computer every half hour to do some simple stretches, dancing to your favourite song with the kids, or rearranging your furniture. Take advantage of the many online exercise programs, including the On Demand classes online hosted by Yoga Mamas.

4. Healthy eating
My mantra to my kids has always been food is mood! Research shows that what we eat
actually does impact our emotional state, as our food provides the fuel for our brain. In
addition 95% of serotonin, the neurotransmitter that helps regulate sleep, appetite,
mediate mood and inhibit pain is formed in the gastrointestinal tract. The relatively new
field of nutritional psychiatry studies this brain/ gut connection. Healthy eating doesn’t mean cutting out all the foods you love, but limiting processed food and adding as much nutrition to meals and snacks as possible. This is particularly hard to do when we are stressed as we seek comfort foods, so just do your best.

5. Mindfulness
There are a lot of misconceptions about Mindfulness. Put simply, it is a process of
slowing down and noticing sensations in the body as well as the comings and goings of
thoughts, without judgment. Don’t get stressed out if your mind wanders or you have
trouble breathing the way the practice suggests. Just try to relax and enjoy a few
minutes of solitude. Investigate the many apps and practices available and that are suited to your needs. Here are a few suggestions recommended by Parent’s Magazine: Mind The Bump, Expectful, Gentle Birth, The Mindfulness App, Stop, Breathe and Think, and Insight Timer.

6. Self-Compassion
Self-compassion is just what it sounds like; directing compassion towards yourself
instead of being hard on yourself. This tendency to self-shame through negative self-
talk is called the “negativity bias." Evolutionary psychologists think this mechanism in
the brain and the nervous system was designed to keep us safe from physical danger.
Unfortunately it causes us to focus on the negative more readily than on the positive.
We can learn to recognize these negative thought patterns, name them, investigate
their source, allow them to dissipate and replace them with kinder, more gentle
assessments of ourselves. Try the 20min RAIN meditation by Dr. Tara Brach to practice
self-compassion.

If you think you may need some help in managing your mental wellness, feel free to
book an online appointment.

I look forward to meeting you.

Until then stay well,
Susan

​Susan Haller